the drama

i'm starting to believe that there are some things in life... not only queer souls but everyone really... has to go through whether equipped with knowing what to avoid doing or totally oblivious. yes, rites of passage. it's inevitable. that it's just how things work. it's a pattern.

when i was in my early to mid-20s and doing full-time advocacy, i had this fear... the fear of turning into something like my much older queer friends. i mean i love them with all my heart. but there were just things they have that i didn't agree of. some thoughts and line of thinking they shared, things they do, things they compromise.

it was not only a conscious effort on my part to be different, i thought i wanted to set a more progressive example of the ideal queer.

that if i keep being conscious of the do's and the don'ts i set up, i'd be walking in the right direction.

but years after and several failed relationships along with them, i realized that i myself broke many of my own rules. and it's not that i was clueless that i did... i was in fact conscious.

i realized that some compromises are essential and in the process make you genuinely mature.

yes, the drama... hahah

a lot of people claim to dislike 'drama'.

these days... i answer them by saying before you hate and avoid the 'drama' make sure you know and understand the drama first. i know a lot of these people are posers... just parroting the lines of the real burnedouts who have yet to realize how much their hearts are capable of expanding even more.

that avoiding the drama is merely a stage. eventually, everyone will crawl back to the arms of drama.

the question is... will they also return to being romantic or will they now be rational.

that's where we draw the line between survivors and dumb assed masochists. LOL